To each his own.

It's funny to see how each one of my friends treats this me in California situation differently. I have some friends who constantly tell me how much they miss me and they want me to comeback to Colorado. They call me sober and they call me drunk and without fail tell me to come "home." Then, I have other friends who try to keep minimal contact with me and do not tell me they miss me because they supposedly want to make everything easier on me. By them keeping to themselves maybe I will not miss them or Colorado as much. I am trying to figure out which I like better. I like that my friends tell me they miss me because it makes me realize I will not be forgotten and that I am loved. But I understand people wanting to make this situation as easy for me as possible. But the bottom line is I am going to miss people no matter what. Not just one person is going to make me want to comeback to Colorado. Plus, I am pass the initial phase of always wanting to go back to Colorado everytime I make any contact with a friend. I have realized with these two type of friends, that they do what they do because they love me and they really do miss me. I have been so amazed at how much support I have. It makes me think I can conquer the world.

You know you are in LA when...

You know you are in LA when you say you want to get into the world of entertainment and the person says to you, "Really?I know some people that could you help you out." Everybody supposedly "knows" somebody out here. But don't you think if people actually "knew somebody" we all would have entertainment careers? My roommate is this particular field and I cannot tell you how many times people have said this to her.

The Real Thing

The Real Thing
by Gwen Stefani

I've seen your face a thousand times
Have all your stories memorized
I've kissed your lips a million ways
But I still love to have you around

I've held you too many times to count
I think I know you inside out
And we're together most days
But I still love to have you around

And you're the one I want and it's not just a phase
And you're the one I trust, our love is the real thing

Don't go away
My love (my love)
I want you to stay
In my life
Don't go away
My lover (my love)
I'm happiest when we spend time

You're a salty water, ocean wave
You knock me down, you kiss my face
I know the storms will always come
But I still love to have you around

Heavens knows what will come next
So emotional, you're so complex
A rollercoaster, built to crash
But I still love to have you around

You're the one I want and it's not just a phase
You're the one I trust, our love is the real thing

Don't go away
My love (my love)
I want you to stay
In my life
Don't go away
My lover (my love)
I'm happiest when we spend time (it's only you and I)

It's you there when I close my eyes
And you in the morning
I never thought you'd still be mine
Or I'd really need to have you around

Don't go away
My love (my love)
I want you to stay
In my life
Don't go away
My lover (my love)
I need you, you're my love supply

Don't go away
My love (you're my love supply)
I want you to stay
In my life (every day, every night)
Don't go away
My lover (you're my love supply)
I need you, you're my love supply

3:30AM...are you kidding?

I have been at work since 3:30AM this morning. I just got out of work around 5:30PM this evening....HAHAHAHA....I am so delirious right now and I am so amazed at the whole idea of this "day after thanksgiving" phenomenon. People wake up at 5:30AM to come into our store to buy one get one free in micro fleeces...are you kidding me? It was 5:40AM and I asked this guy if he needed help and he responded with, "Just browsing." What? Who just browses at 5:30 in the morning. Needless to say, it wasn't that bad. I am amazed at the authority I hold in this store and how much power I actually have over the other employees. I think I am too young for this...HAHAHAHA!.......On another note, since I finally have time to relax and think, I find myself in a somber mood at the moment. And this time it is not about missing my friends and family necessarily. It's about this whole idea of change and realizing things just a second too late. My entire life these past two months has revolved around change. Everything around me has changed, but I would like to believe that I have not changed. And if I have I hope it is for the better. I have realized so many things these past couple months. And what scares me is that maybe I realized them too late. I think deep down I have always known I needed to go somewhere else and really understand who I am and what I was leaving behind. I want to truly understand the importance of my family and friends. I love my friends more then when I left. And honestly, there are those certain people that as individuals I have truly realized my feelings. But maybe it came too late. I'm not depressed and I wouldn't even go as far as to say I am sad, but I am pondering. I am wondering what is in store for me in the future.

HAPPY TURKEY DAY

HAPPY TURKEY DAY EVERYONE! YOU ARE ALL IN MY THOUGHTS AND I AM THANKFUL FOR EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU!!

Things To Be Thankful For This Thanksgiving

1) I am thankful for my health.
2) I am thankful for being able to feel the love from my family and friends.
3) I am thankful for music as it seems to keep me sane and define my existance.
4) I am thankful for movies.
5) I am thankful for California Labor Laws because I make more money here than in Colorado...hahah
6) I am thankful for a working car.
7) I am thankful for the food I have to eat, the roof over my head, and the clothes I have to wear.
8) I am thankful for celebrities because they help me to dream.
9) I am thankful I have a job.
10) I am thankful for BEER.
11) I am thankful for nutty bars.
12) I am thankful for the freedom I have in this country.
13) I am thankful for Chipotle.
14) I am thankful for my endless capacity of useless information.
15) I am thankful for my impeccable memory.
16) I am thankful for the ability to laugh and smile.
17) I am thankful for my teeth...hahaha.
18) I am thankful for TEXT MESSAGING of course
19) I am thankful for sugar free red bull
20) I am thankful for my family.
21) I am thankful for my friends.
22) When all is said and done, I am thankful for the fact that I actually made it to California.

There is so much more that I am thankful for, but just not enough room for it all. Please know that as I sit all alone on Thanksgiving(HAHAHA...how pathetic!!) I will be thinking of each and everyone of you. You all have made me who I am today and I would not be able to exist without your love and support. Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Kiss The Rain

Hello...
Do you miss me
I hear you say you do
But not the way I’m missing you

-Billie Myers (Kiss the rain lyrics)

Some time to reflect

It's amazing to me how you kind of just get use to the feeling of missing people. And I don't even know if that is the appropriate way to describe it. Because there are a lot of times when I miss people more than I missed them the day before. There are those times in my life when something good happens, I see a celebrity, I feel like having a drink and just chilling, I want to see a movie, and etc. that makes me wish I had my friends and family around me. I don't believe it has necessarily gotten any easier being away from everyone. But what I believe is that I have come to accept it. I have come to accept that I am here and all of you are there. It doesn't necessaryly make it any easier, but it helps me to not be captivated by my longing for my friends. Lately, I have been trying not to focus so much on that aspect. I have been trying to really focus on the fact that I am in fricking Los Angeles. It has always been my dream to move to California and I actually did it. I have no idea how I did it and what I will do in the future, but I know I am here right now. And I have no choice but to embrace this moment. I love life and even when I am down I still love life and I still love people. I miss everyone but I am fortunate that there will always be my peeps out there even if I am all the way in Cali.

Academy Awards

P.S.....My roommate just landed a job with the Academy Awards. everyone should have a drink for her!!!! LA BABYY!!!!

Movie Premiere

Last night I went to the ALEXANDER premiere in Hollywood. My main motive for going to this particular premiere was to see Angelina Jolie because as many of you know she is my favorite actress/celebrity in the entire world. Unfortunately, we probably arrived just a tad bit too late. However, we were able to see some celebrities. We saw Val Kilmer, Rosario Dawson, Jared Leto, Rebecca DeMornay, and Kobe Bryant. These people were only 30 yards away from us and at times even came over to the crowd and were right in front of us. Needless to say, I was completely star struck again. Although I was bummed we did not see Angelina Jolie I was so ecstatic that I was actually at a real life movie premiere. This has always been a dream of mine and it actually came true. There are movie premieres all the time in LA/Hollywood so I know I will be going to a lot more. I have always seen on TV how the stars walk and model whatever they are wearing and then they may talk to Entertainment Tonight. But to see that in person is unbelievable. Not to mention the photographers that line the red carpet. Sometimes it is hard to see because the flashes on their cameras are so intense. All I can say is it was totally worth it and I cannot believe I actually live here. I live in the middle of pop culture and all I have ever wanted to do was be surround by movies, music, and celebrities. Can you believe I actually do?

Pacific Coast Highway

I have found an alternate route home from work. I usually take the freeway home, but I end up sitting in traffic for an hour and a half and there is absolutely nothing beautiful and fabulous about it. So, everyone has been telling me to take Topanga Canyon to the PCH. Driving through the canyon helps me to remember my roots in Colorado. And once I get to the PCH...it's breath taking. It's about five miles of the Ocean to the right of me as I journey home. It makes living here worthwhile and I am at peace everytime I pass it. I only wish I headed home earlier so it wouldn't get dark, but I must remember, that I do not have to be coming home from work to see the ocean. It's literally 26 blocks from me!!

Saved

It seems like when I am at my lowest point or I am contemplating way too many things one or two of my friends always comes along and "saves" me. I heard from two of my very dear friends the other night and I cannot even explain how better I felt having talked to them and having heard their voices. I never realized that just hearing someones voice and words would be enough to make me feel better. I am grateful to have these people in my life and have my family to always give me words of wisdom and encouragement because I'm battling a lot right now, but in the end I know I will be okay.

Lazy Days

I never realize how much getting up at 5:30am takes its toll on you until my day off. Having worked like 8 days in a row I woke up this morning and went back to bed. I woke up again and went back to bed. And then woke up again and went back to bed. Finally, I woke up and it was 1pm and I decided to get up and walk around or something. I stayed up for around 4 hours until I decided to lay down and read. Yeah, that didn't happen. I definitely fell asleep again. I didn't feel bad though today because I had no plans and where I work out usually was closed today. What was the point of even being awake today? hahahaha

Only white people say that..

So, I am one of four white people that work at my store. It goes to show you the place I grew up in and the people that primarily surrounded me. I always find it funny the CU stated over and over how diverse they were when in reality they weren't at all. Anyway, I work mostly with Hispanics and I was talking with one of the girls today and I asked her how she was feeling. She kind of started to sigh and I responded with, "Oh, asi asi!" She laughed at me and said, "No. It is so funny because only white people say that." I started laughing and told her that was one of the greatest statements anyone has ever made to me. I told her that was how I was taught in school and she went on to explain the differences to me on Spain, Mexico, South America, and etc. Needless to say, it's going to be quite the learning experience.

Breakaway

Okay, so I usually do not like Kelly Clarkson but the cheesy side of me likes this song because I think it is my anthem...It is my life!

Kelly Clarkson Lyrics

Breakaway Lyrics

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I just stared out my window
Dreaming of a could-be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)

Trying not to reach out
But when I'd try to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I pray (I would pray)
I could breakaway

[Chorus:]
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

[Chorus]

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around wild indoors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakaway

I'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk
Take chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway

Hot water burn baby

I saw Dustin Hoffman on the 3rd street Promenade mall last night...Holy Crap!!

Is that really your name?

Yesterday at work I had a bit of an issue with an extremely rude lady. One of the sales associates called me to the front to deal with this customer. The conversation between she and I goes as follows...

Sales Associate: Blair, she wants to return these pants she said she bought yesterday but she doesn't have a receipt. I told her we can only do store credit, but she wants it back on her credit card.

Blair: Umm...we can only give you store credit or an even exchange if you do not have your original receipt. It's company policy.

Customer: (YELLING)....I don't have my receipt. I don't want store credit. I want it back on my card. I frickin bought these yesterday. Why will you not let me get my money back. What? Do you think I am tryin to scam you? What is wrong with you?

Blair: No maam, I do not think you are trying to scam us. But what you have to understand is that this is a company policy. Our system will not let us give you cash back without a receipt. I am not trying to be mean here and single you out.

MEANWHILE, customers are piling up along the registers as this lady continues to get more and more angry with me.

Customer: (STILL YELLING)....I don't want store credit. I don't even like this store. I never even shop here. Every other store would be happy to give me my money back, but you are so messed up that you won't.

Blair: (HOLDING BACK EVERY BIT OF ANGER I HAVE)....If you go home and try to look for your receipt and bring it back we will have no problem taking care of you...

Customer: This is bull shit. Who is your manager? Let me talk to him.

Blair: Well, I am the manager right now....You know what? Would you like corporates number? Maybe they can help you out?

Customer: Yes and what is your name? I want your name so I can tell them about you.

Blair: My name is Blair...B..L..A..I...R...(she looks at me with disgust)..My last name is Brown.

The customer rolls her eyes at me...

Customer: Is that really your name? It sounds kind of shady to me.

Other customer behind me: She is not lying about her name lady...JESUS!!!

Blair: Ha...um I am pretty sure that is my real name.

Customer: If I bring my receipt back I better not get anymore crap.

She storms off!!

HAHAHA...turns out the lady came back later in the day and had found her receipt. She didn't say one word about me and I guess didn't call corporate on me. The thing is she didn't know what I knew...Corporate Offices are not open on the weekends...HAHAHA!!

Oh My God, that was just like Wally World

Yesterday I had the day off, which was weird because it was a Wednesday and I usually only have the weekends off. But anyway, the night before when my roommate and I were sitting at our favorite Hooka Bar called Dahab we decided we would go to Magic Mountain. So, we got home at 3am, purchased out tickets and went to bed anxious for the next day. So, head north on the 405 towards Sacramento and Magic Mountain is about half hour or so away from where we live. As we see it from the highway we both are getting excited for what the rollercoasters look like and so on. When we turn into the entrance we literally just stopped. We stared as our mouths dropped and we realized Magic Mountain was closed. Why it was closed we had no idea, but it was closed. Not a soul was in the parking lot. I looked at Erin, "This is Wally World. We are the Grizwald's from National Lampoon. I cannot believe this is happening." We were both very pissed off, but astonished at how much everyday our lives portray somewhat of a movie. She and I plan on writing a script or I should say she does more than I. But this is one scene that will definitely go in the script. The rest of the day we thought about Magic Mountain being closed and what the significance of it all was. We never came to any conclusions accept that next time we might buy a bb gun and see if we can get in even if it is closed...hahaha

Was that just Arsenio?

So, yesterday I was walking up to the front of my store and walked by as a customer was standing there talking to some other associates. I looked at him and he looked at me and I continued on my way. Two seconds later I came back and asked the associates...was that just arsenio hall? Well, turns out it was and he was still in the store when I said this. Another star sighting. I think I should keep a book on how many celebrities I see in the next year.