A Sea Of Green

I have just returned from Dahab, our favorite Hooka Bar. And now I find random thoughts running through my head. I feel jealousy right now. And I really hate jealousy, but it's so obvious in us all. I guess I am jealous that all my friends back in Colorado or wherever get to see each other whenever they want and I am out here and don't get to see them. I am jealous that they still have each other and I am out here and have nobody. And I am not saying that I don't have anybody but I don't have any of my friends physically near me. And I don' t even know if jealousy is the way to describe it. It probably just comes down to me missing everyone and wishing that certain parts of my life were easier or were the way they once were. At the same time, I don't want anything the way it once was. That can't be how my life is anymore. I just wish seeing people was easier. I am jealous that I can't see my mom and the rest of my family can. I am jealous that I can't see my dad and Ann and my brother can whenever he wants. I am out here trying to discover something and everyone else seems to be in their comfort zone. Although, my comfort zone is starting to become more apparent, I still feel lost at times. Oh well, thank God I haven't lost contact with anyone. Thank God I know who my real friends are. And when all is said and done, thank God I was able to move out here on my own.