The Shit Bandit

So, supposedly there's this homeless guy that comes into our store and always uses our bathroom. Well, I guess he shits and then takes his hand puts it in his own shit and smears the wall with it. I mean all over the men's bathroom. And not only does he do that but he draws obscene pictures with his own poop...HAHAHAHA!!! It's completely disgusting and I don't even know what he looks like so I cannot tell him to leave. But anyway, the cleaning lady came up to me yesterday and said, "The Shit Bandit was back today!" I hesitated for a second and looked at her confused. After it all registered what she was talking about I just started busting up laughing. That is the coolest name I have ever heard. Now, I know this may disgust the readers, but I must keep you all updated on how glamorous my job truly is...HAHAHA!!